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By Fiona M A young married woman sits in front of her computer typing a question into a website. She explains that she has fallen out of love with her husband so, along with her three kids, she is thinking she should get him to leave and she wants anyone who is listening in cyberspace to advise her. Is this what she should do? What would you do in her position? How do you know when a relationship is over? Well, a relationship is over whenever you want it to be over. The question to ask is should it be over? If you are compatible with your partner, so you share the same goals, priorities, values and aspirations and you want the same things as each other, the chances are good that your relationship should not be over. Like the young woman typing her question into the Internet, it might be that with some nurturing, romance and care, your relationship can grow stronger and more fulfilling for both of you. Of course, in instances of abuse, it is time to leave (and quickly). Abuse takes many forms, you do not have to punch someone to be abusive, you can mentally, sexually or emotionally abuse your partner too. But if you think you are in danger, or your children are in danger, you should immediately remove you and the children from the environment that presents the risk. No relationship is perfect, not even the very good ones. You live in fairyland if you are waiting for the perfect relationship. Either that or you have watched too many Disney princess movies. The bottom line is that no relationship is perfect. Even the very good, strong relationships have their bumps and scrapes as two people come together and try to harmoniously co exist as one couple. If you are waiting for perfection, you will wait for a very long time, and you will have many separations along the way. Be aware of yourself. Are you afraid of commitment? Do you drive potentially good partners away because you have expectations of them that it is impossible for them to meet? Good couples get cross with one another, they argue because they have a difference of opinion, they forget important dates just like everyone else. The difference is that they share important values, priorities and attitudes in common and they are both willing to invest in making the relationship work over the long haul. Everything changes when children are involved With children involved, as there were in the case of this young woman, you owe it to your children to be sure that you have exhausted all means of fixing your relationship problems. Why? Because it is the children that often bear the emotional scar of a split between their parents and they may carry this scar for their whole lifetime. Exhausting all means may mean undergoing some counseling (either alone or as a couple) or making a personal commitment to each other that you will both work at the relationship to see if you can get it back on track. If this does not work, the question that decides the stay or go outcome of the relationship is whether you and your partner are setting the right example for your children. A couple can continue to live as a couple with no arguments, but with no fulfilling relationship either. Is this what you want your children to accept is normal? Do you want them to aspire to have a relationship just like yours? You both serve as their role models and you must take this responsibility very seriously. Life is too short If you do not have children, the pain of separating is not necessarily any less, but time and space helps people heal and it tends to be easier to move on since you do not need to keep in regular contact with your former partner because of your kids. Life is too short to waste on the wrong person. Every day should be a day that you live your life to the fullest in every way you can imagine. It is too short to be wasted on too many tears, too many fights, too many low points. And the world is an immensely big place and there are a great many people in it that you can meet. One of whom may be just the person you have been waiting for. For the full article, including what to do if you have separated and you realize it is a mistake, please visit www.whentoseparate.com Fiona Mackenzie is the author of How To Know: When To Separate a practical eBook that deals with the relationship topic of how to know when it is over. “How To Know: When To Separate” includes tips, strategies and techniques used by the author to manage the end of her relationship and learn how to be happy once more. For more articles and help, visit us online at http://www.whentoseparate.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Fiona_M http://EzineArticles.com/?How-to-Know-When-It-is-Over&id=464038 payday installment loan one hour loans online for bad credit magnum cash loans pay day loan franchise